WHEN LIFE GETS HARD POST-WLS: REAL TALK & KINDNESS
Trigger Warning: Be kind to yourself and don’t compare your journey to others.
What happens when life squeezes us? If you’re here for perfectly polished tips or a glossy highlight reel, this might not be the post for you. But if you’re navigating the stormy waters of life post-bariatric surgery and wondering how to keep yourself afloat, then pull up a chair. You are not alone.
This is not an “I have all the answers” post. This is a “life has been tough, but there is hope” post. Because if you’ve been struggling, I see you. And I want you to know that you’re not failing—this journey is just hard sometimes.
WHY THIS MATTERS TO BARIATRIC LIFE
Bariatric surgery is not just about weight loss. It’s about learning how to navigate life with a different body, a different digestive system, and often, a different mindset. And when life throws curveballs—big ones—it can impact how we take care of ourselves, what we eat, how we move, and even how we think about ourselves.
2024 was a brutal year for me. I spent a week in hospital in March because I was on the toilet upwards of 30 times a day. I was diagnosed with Bile Acid Malabsorption. Then, in April, they found another stomach ulcer and something called Candy Cane Syndrome. I need revision surgery. I live with pain every day. And I know many of you do, too. I am booked for surgery in June of this year. That will be another blog series.
Pain doesn’t mean we don’t have beautiful lives. But it does mean we have to be intentional about how we care for ourselves.
On top of my health, life just kept coming. Changes in work, relationships that I thought were solid just changed, my kids facing their own health challenges—including hospitalisations. Then, in June, my mum was diagnosed with cancer. In July, one of my sons had a blood clot in his lung. In August, my other son had a terrible injury. That same month, my dad came back from an overseas trip, had a massive heart attack, and needed a quadruple bypass. He caught COVID while waiting for surgery, so he was in isolation before they could operate. At one point, both my parents were in hospital at the same time—Mum in Oncology, Dad in ICU. Life was just a lot.
During all of this, I was meant to have surgery, but I pushed it back. My husband, Steve, was also meant to have surgery, but due to an awful work situation, it’s been delayed, too.
The past few months have been lonely, exhausting, and overwhelming. And in these times, old habits can whisper to us. “Just eat. It’ll make you feel better.” Or, on the flip side, “You don’t have time to eat.”
But here’s what I’ve learned: hard times are when our self-care matters most.
WHAT I DO TO STAY STEADY WHEN LIFE IS CHAOS
I don’t always get it right, but there are things I refuse to do now:
🫶🏻 I refuse to hurt myself with food.
This doesn’t mean I eat perfectly. It means I remind myself that binging or skipping meals won’t help. I pause. I check in with myself. And I do my best to stay grounded.
🫶🏻 I have a plan for the tough days.
If I’m emotionally or physically drained, I release myself from the mental load of cooking and choose an easy option that still aligns with my goals.
I keep emergency meals in the freezer.
I always have quick, no-cook options like a hot roast chook, a bag of salad, and some wraps.
I keep pre-packaged protein bars in my bag so I don’t get caught out.
🫶🏻 I stick to my routine as much as I can.
When I let go of my non-negotiables, everything else crumbles.
My vitamins, my meals, my daily walk—they are my anchor. They keep me steady.
🫶🏻 I remind myself that asking for help is strength, not weakness.
This is a work in progress for me, but I am grateful for the people in my life who check in on me.
I still see a psychologist, and I wouldn’t be without that support.
IF YOU’RE STRUGGLING, PLEASE HEAR THIS:
If you’ve had a hard time lately, just trying to hold it together, you are not alone. I know it’s hard, but taking time for yourself matters. Even if it’s five minutes to breathe, a short walk in the fresh air, or simply eating one nourishing meal today—start there.
The other night, after getting some good news about Mum, I went out with friends. I danced. I let go, even if just for a moment. And it reminded me that even in the middle of the storm, joy still exists.
You are doing better than you think. Keep going.
With love and kindness, always. ❤️
Love Tash
